For me there is something special about (certain/some) music. I am no musician myself, though I wish I were and maybe some day even will be. Who knows? For me it's different from anything else, maybe like a drug sometimes. Keeps me calm, keeps me safe. Esp. when I'm alone...
I think music is emotional by it's very nature. Even if you can't process or identify your emotions you still have them inside of you. Music should have some effect on you regardless of your ability to sense it. Just having a preference to one kind of music over another should be proof of that.
I play bass myself, and I'm in a band.
There is something about certain music, it gives me a feeling of 'desire' or 'longing'. This it, what connects together my personal taste here. Often these are 'sad' songs, but not always. Sometimes these are 'happy' and 'sad' the same time. Only few musicians are like that for me, most of them being women... Obviously also their lyrics fit this 'mood'. I won't call names here, that'd be too much revealing my identity ;)
I'm just being curious: mindspore, what type of music is that band you are in? If you can dare to 'categorize' it?
We could never categorize our music very well, some of our songs are heavy metal, some are more mainstream rock, some are acoustic. I joined the band because they were friends and family of mine, I liked their music, and they needed a bass player. I didn't know how to play bass (or any instrument), but I bought a bass and told them I wanted to learn it to join the band and they said 'you're in the band'.
I like all kinds of music though. I haven't found a style I don't like, but there are some I like more than others. For instance, I like many rap songs, but there are many more I don't care for. Two of my favorite bands are They Might Be Giants and Faith No More.
Some of my favorite performers are women who play piano and sing, such as Tori Amos. When I hear a song I like I am much more likely to seek out more by that artist if they have written it themselves.
Wow, I can't believe I found this site. I have been trying to figure out what is "wrong" with me for awhile now. That questionnaire was almost eerie to do.
I like music because it usually very straightforward with how it wants you to feel. Music/tv shows/movies are usually the only times I feel much of anything that I can identify clearly.
I especially like the indie rock playlist, ya'll should check it out if you like a lot of different kinds of music and want to find new stuff.
I agree wholeheartedly that emotions induced by music seem much more clearly defined, or at least they do for me. I also love that I can figure out what sort of mood I want to be in, pick the appropriate song, and then just let my iPod do the work. It's handy being able to change my mood in such an easy and entertaining way. I think it also helps me understand the less clearly defined emotions that I spent year just ignoring.
I started listening to pop punk and post-hardcore when i was in 7th grade, and now it's my life. I can't go a day without it. There was an earlier poster that said certain types of music fill them with desire, and that's exactly what I feel. I have a burning need to jump in a van with a bunch of my friends, tour the country, and make kids like me feel important.
Yes, music is one of the only outlets for me to experience strong, somewhat identifiable emotion.
What makes it so interesting for me is that music operates on a sensory level, yet I seem to understand it as though it were "speaking" to me. I prefer music without words, or in a foreign language that I do not know (I love to sing, but find memorizing words difficult or meaningless). It allows me to empathize with the singer/composer in a way that I am otherwise unable to do. It is extraordinarily intimate.
Playing music with other people, and social dancing, are the most rewarding modes of social interaction I have ever come across. I always thought it was because of my social anxiety, and that is part of it. Now I suspect it is because music is a way of communication that makes more sense and has more meaning than talking for me. Also, as an asexual, I find music arousing physically. It seems to unlock my very identity.
Music has allowed me to find expressions for my 'emotions'
The only times I have ever cried was from a particular beautiful piece of music but I never know why this happens. If there are sections I find most connected to I will edit it and put it on repeat, to really try and explore an emotion it brings forth because I'm simply unable to do this myself naturally. I end up never knowing what the feeling is still but i continue listen anyway so I don't seem like such a robot all the time.
I'm a musician and I used to do some acting also, but they told me I was bad at it because I don't show enough emotion. Ughh.
Anyway, I feel like music helps me to feel things, I listen to many, many different genres and each style of music is like a new gateway for my emotions. There is so much amazing music out there. I try to walk and/or run everyday because it seems to flush some of the negative out of my day; but I can't leave the house without my headphones in or else I will probably go nuts. I can't run unless I have something up beat playing. I can't cry unless I have a song that can help me understand what I am feeling. Even then I have a lot of trouble crying, even though the feeling to do it is so strong. Does anyone else struggle to cry but feel the need to often??
I also self-harm because I get so worked up trying to figure out what it is that I'm feeling, and then when I can't, I attempt to push it away with physical pain. I see a counsellor, and it is really hard for me to tell answer her questions. Mostly 'Why'. 'Why were you upset, what pushed you to cutting yourself'. And when I sit there silently for a few minutes and answer with 'I don't know', she always says 'Yes you do'. It's just so confusing and I can't explain the things that I feel to her or anyone. She knows I have trouble expressing myself so she is trying to push me.
I stopped self-harming a few months ago and now I have relapsed after breaking up with my boyfriend. I broke up with him because I got bored of him. I was so guilty about it and now there are so many emotions in my head that I am trying so hard to figure out because it won't stop plaguing my brain! Argh...
Anyone else know how I am feeling? Or what I should do??
Thanks
Burning trees - go tell your doctor or a close friend or family member that can help you go tell your doctor. Best of luck that you can stop self-harming.
I only recently found out about Alexi...So glad I found this forum. The only time I can find emotion is when I listen to music. As soon as I saw this thread I couldn't wait to read it because I always recognized that the musical connection to my emotions when nothing else could bring out the feelings...not even personal situations. Exciting to read others' experiences and relate to people...finally!
I have not been here for a longer time - actually it's not Alexi, what's "wrong" with me, yet something else... Did not have a very good time over the last 1 1/2 years... But I am feeling - hard to believe - better the last days, now doing intensively the things I was "born for"... has something to do with design and music... and poetry...
Snow
it is now - very very slowly - revealing to me that, probably I have to ACCEPT just what I am and... "work with that". I wish you all the best.... If you ask me, talk to a friend. Was best for me...
I recently came across a couple quotes that really resonated with me:
"Music is what feelings sound like."
~Author Unknown
"If a composer could say what he had to say in words he would not bother trying to say it in music."
~Gustav Mahler
A friend has an autistic son, and he has started communicating by playing sections of Disney videos or speaking lines from movies he has memorized. From what I've read on the subject, it seems that alexithymia does not indicate autism, but almost everybody in the autism spectrum has alexithymia.
I teach yoga, and one of the things we do as yoga teachers is put ourselves out there, exposing ourselves to the class to help them deal with their emotions by our example. For an alexithymic, that doesn't even make sense! When I started teaching, my classes were good physically, but lacked depth and emotion (duh!). As my teaching evolved, I discovered that by creating a playlist of songs with just the right energy, I can inspire my class in the way I want. It's like speaking my emotions through music. I never really understood what I was doing when I started using music this way, but the effect was real, and the most consistent comments on my classes are about the music I play.
Like others in this thread, I like a wide variety of music, and it often moves me to tears or makes me feel giddy in ways I don't really do otherwise. Bouncing around in a good mosh pit makes me feel more alive than I ever do in most other situations.
I wish I had more musical talent because I think that might be a good way to let people know how I feel. Maybe I'll try composing a few things...
Hi there... after all... "I don't care anymore" to show me... (lol)... you can "see" me here:
http://www.hifi-forum.de/index.php?action=browseT&forum_id=217&thread=243&z=2
everything I had to give, I gave... it is mostly in german, yet you will understand enough, I think...
yesterday had kind of a bad ... "flashback", whatever...
All the ****ing best... Snow
>>Maybe I'll try composing a few things...<<
this seems like a very good idea to me... would some texts/poems be useful for you? they are not "outstandingly" good, however... I can't write melodies and so on... so I would pass the texts on,... why not?
(rest of post is missing...) that seems like a good idea to me! Could you need some text/poems? I could never make up melodies and so on, yet I would pass my texts on... sure, why not?
