Topic: What exactly is it like to feel emotions?

Hi, I know this is late to your question, I personally can't answer what it's like to have feelings. I'm 59 yrs old and to the best of my knowledge I've never had feelings. I do however possess a unique gift, when talking with someone face to face I just know what they want to hear, so that is how I've managed to fake feelings with people over the yrs. But I too have wondered what it would be like to have feelings. As far as my thoughts go I'm always in control of them, they never slip for me. For me I also don't get the physical ques from my body. I'll say good luck in finding someone to answer your questions though.

Hi there :) I don't have Alexithymia. Admittedly, describing emotions to someone with little to no reference to them, is a challenge (even for someone with feelings). I might not do the best job but I'll try my best. I think everyone experiences thoughts and emotions differently but most people experience emotions both mentally and physically. Most emotions are felt mentally like boredom, contentment, joy, etc. But intense emotions can cause both physical and mental reactions such as sadness driving you to cry and even feel physical pain, excitement might cause your heart and thoughts to race, anxiety might make you sweat and make breathing difficult.

If you do feel some form of emotions, i would encourage you to practice "stepping into" them, explore them and familiarize yourself with those sensations. For example, focus on an emotion. While it's in your head, try to bring your attention to your body and take some time to make note of any physical sensations you feel such as tension, goosebumps, increased heart rate, etc. Then bring your attention inside your head and notice any images, shapes/colors or sounds that might come up. I think exploring with some sense of curiosity is a good place to start.

I scored a 151 on the test. I’ve come to find out that it’s likely I have alexithymia. I also told my parents about it and why I couldn’t explain why I was crying so much and why I enjoyed it for some reason.

I asked my mom what sadness felt like and she told me how she would hate feeling it and want it to go away. But I was the opposite trying to cultivate and intensify the emotion.

But Thinking back on my life I don’t really have a grip on what emotions feel like. That’s why I ask other people sometimes.

But I was the opposite trying to cultivate and intensify the emotion.
this is scary. i did that too. i always knew i had a hard time letting my emotions out, and the once in a blue moon i'd have a tear inducing moment i would try to intensify it so i could identify what i was feeling.

I imagine its quite exhausting.

I scored a 156 -- I don't see this as a disadvantage. I like being able to view life logically without being torn up thinking of emotions all the time. And anyway, alexithymia doesn't mean no emotions -- its just deep rooted emotions that are difficult to recognize.
I prefer to keep things light, anyway. When others talk about emotions I get exhausted and anxious.

I tend to get 'empty' and 'down' at times when I leave myself alone too long and start overthinking everything. Which is why I enjoy learning new hobbies in all my spare time. I'll often get home and randomly decide to start learning a new language, or learn how to program, or dance, or a million other things.
Having a focus helps keep me grounded and satisfied with my life.

Hi I’m new here. I scored a 166 and am starting to realize that I’m not a strong person, that I may be broken in this way. Kind of weird. But I do feel stuff sometimes. My normal emotions are anxiety, stress, and anger. My anger is not explosive but more simmering or possibly absence of injustice. I don’t know. Most of the time I am not experiencing these things but if I’m feeling something, it’s usually one of these three. In January something really bad happened and for the first time in my life (that I can remember) I cried. All night I balled like a baby. And afterwards I felt calm. Those were two different feelings that I hadn’t felt as far back as I could remember and it hasn’t happened since then. What’s weird is that I run a crisis center. My degree is in human service counseling with a focus in trauma. I guess this condition allows me to handle the situations we see every day without emotionally breaking down. Although I do at time’s feel over stressed and am able to identify that I need a break or vacation to reduce my stress levels. What really got me on the questionnaire, were the questions about sex. Sex has always been a mechanical release for me, never emotional. My wife always tells me that she wants sex to “feel connected or loved”. I don’t understand that, but I know there are times when I need sex and it’s important for our relationship that we both orgasm and she likes it more when we both do it at the same time. I never realized that my view on this was not in the realm of normal for guys. Interesting.
I’ve learned so far that people with this often exhibit other disorders. I am not autistic although my sister is. I do exhibit some addictive personality allotted traits. Specifically I drink wine every night. But I don’t know if it’s at the level of addictive personality disorder.
I don’t know what I expect from this post, possibly some affirmation that my experiences are shared or maybe just to help me think through this. But in just this last hour I have learned more about myself than I have in the last few years. So that is good I think.